how to prioritize your life

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"If you want your life to have a point, you'll have to taper it."  -Laura Francis

Verbal checkmate death blow to a recovering thought I could do it all, but I know 'tis true.    So as I vacillate between missions of ending hunger, building bridges out of poverty, swimming with dolphins, riding elephants in Bangladesh, folding laundry, cooking dinner, loving orphans, globetrotting, caring for widows and poor folk, telling people Jesus loves em, singing songs of hope, going grocery shopping, teaching and encouraging others, the whole taper thing comes to mind because you see, my list is broad.  T  O  O  B  R  O  A  D.  Time to narrow down, lean in and focus on what's really important in the right here and right now... in this season of life.  Doesn't mean I won't build bridges out of poverty.  Doesn't mean I won't love and care for widows and orphans.  Because I do and I will continue to do so; however, there is a natural order to fulfilling your dreams and it revolves heavily around your life priorities.  A few years ago, my brother shared this revolutionary list with me and now I'm sharing it with you.  In order of importance, here goes:

God
Spouse
Children
Call of God
Job
Others 
Yourself

PLEASE for the love of all things seen and unseen, keep reading even if you're single, have no children or think that God sucks.  I ask you to keep reading because for everyone, purpose and priority begin with the deep, intuitive, genuine part of you that is spirit.  Hence spirituality or a relationship with God (who LOVES YOU UNCONDITIONALLY and is like the best dad/dream dad ever!).  For me, the list above helps tremendously because if I am working my singing, writing and speaking while neglecting my hubster and our young'un, I know that I've just booked a one-way ticket to Crazy Town.  And since I no longer enjoy trips to that place, I now know how to re-direct and re-focus my efforts.  Meditating on scriptures and praying always bring me back to center and from there it's easy peasy to do life.  I cannot tell you how many times I have forgotten this simple yet profound truth.  Nor can I tell you how many years my priorities in life looked like this:

Me
Doing
Whatever
I 
Want 
To
Do


OR THIS:


Doing 
Everything
That
Others
Want 
Me 
To Do

Yeah, those eras didn't fare so well.  

Today I am so grateful to be living in a place of clarity where my priorities are straight.  Yes, walking it out can be a real booger at times, but I'm committed to giving my best effort everyday.  Doing my 100% absolute best and trusting God to do the rest.    

The cool thing about this list for properly prioritizing life is that it works for every stage and every aspect of life.  Married with no kids?  Life priorities looks this: 

God
Spouse
Call of God

Job

Others 

Yourself

Not married with kids?
God
Children

Call of God

Job

Others 

Yourself

Single with no kids?
God
Call of God
Job
Others 
Yourself

You see, you just skip over any aspect of  life that doesn't apply to you.  Skip over any aspect EXCEPT GOD.  <---That's the clincher here and He applies to you, loves you and wants to be part of your life whether you know it or not.  Whether you open your heart to Him or not... and even if you think He sucks, He still loves you with a passion because He's just bomb.com like that.  

If you're single now but you get married next year, you add spouse to the list at the appropriate time.  

The "call of God" is specific to each individual and it includes: 
your natural talents and gifted-ness
the issues that you are passionate about
the thing(s) you do that make(s) your heart race and 
you never ever get tired of it and 
it never ever feels like "work"

For me those things are writing, singing, speaking/teaching, working with young people and encouraging others.  Sometimes your job and the call of God are synonymous.  Other times they are two separate entities altogether.  Neither way is wrong or right, it just depends on the season (of life) you're in...

And placing yourself at the end of the list does NOT mean that you neglect to take care of yourself.  No you ARE to care for yourself.   It's all about maintaining a healthy balance, knowing that life is not ALL about you yet knowing that it's not about neglecting yourself either.  It's a delicate balance for sure, but it is totally do-able.  One of my favorite reminders from scripture is this: Love your neighbor as your self.  How can I love my neighbor if I don't love myself?  It's not possible, peeps.  So it's about living with the awareness that life is not "all about me" (aka being selfish or narcissistic), learning the balance of giving and receiving as well as caring for others and myself.  Placing yourself at the top of the list is the fast track to Narcissist Island, which ultimately isolates and destroys the individual.  Even the Greeks knew that to be true.  See their story about Narcissus here.

God's totally unselfish love is the only sustaining force that cannot be diluted, compromised, found faulty or remotely shaken.  And I know this only because it happens to be my bedrock foundation.  The fact that I am still standing (after all I have been through) is no little thing.  I'm sure the same is true for you. So, that being said, let's get and keep our priorities straight.  Let's adjust whenever we see a subtle reminder that things are off track.  For years, I kept this list on my bathroom mirror and it was also written in the the front flap of my journal.  I think it's time for me to put the list on display once more.  

Let us live with hope for a bright future that is the fulfillment of our wildest, deepest and most passionate dreams; yet be fully focused and engaged in the present, that which is before us today.  Paper stacks, half finished projects, punches in the face from the internet and all... I like to keep myself accountable and in check on the daily never forgetting the fact that I've got a pimped out ride in Bangladesh.  

♥ Sharita

Word with the Wise Wednesday: Laura Francis

1. What important life lessons have you learned so far?
Think before you speak.  You do not have to say everything you think.  Everything you think doesn't have to pop out of your mouth.  Think before you speak. 


2. How is the world today different or similar to what it was like when you were a child?
As a child, I had an experience where I knew that I was different.  My mother would give me my lunch and lock me out for most of the day.  I can remember sitting on a salt lick in the corral in my little white dress with no shoes on... I was eating a bologna sandwich and drinking koolaid when all of a sudden, I had this epiphany.  I felt so much peace, joy and LOVE.  I knew that I was loved and that I was beautifully, wonderfully made.  I felt like God was saying, "It's you and me, kid."  That moment changed my world in a very positive way and the revelation has deepened over time.  In my heart, I am still that lil' girl who receives His love.  As I keep growing and seeking, I continue to have full circle moments where I am reminded that I am different and that it's not so much how the world has changed (or stayed the same), but how I have changed.  


3. What has been your hardest lesson to date?
Embracing silence.  I continue to deal with that because when you're telling, you're selling.  Ask a question and be silent.  If they're saying it (the answer), they're learning it as truth.  


4. What do you want people to remember about you?
That I was a possibilitarian.  One of my greatest joys in life is helping others become better people.  Empowering others to know this: You can manifest your dreams.  God made this world and we have creative power as well.  Everything in your heart is do-able.  




Isn't she AMAZING?!?! 


For reals, Laura Francis is one of the wisest, kindest, most knowledgeable, compassionate and encouraging people I know.  She is a true possibilitarian, which means if there is a way, she will have it figured out.  I have observed her in action many times and she is flat out awesome.  With Laura there is no box to think outside of because quite simply, there is no box.  She sees a world full of endless options and possibilities and she truly loves to help others discover and fulfill their purpose and passion.  She has helped me many, many times!  I like to call her a catalyst because she definitely creates and/or accelerates the pace of the process, opportunity or event.  I love learning from her and just being around her.  She is positively radiant like that.  Holler if you'd like to swap howdy's with her!  




Happy Wednesday to yall!  :D