your best self

Regardless of what others are doing, always purpose and endeavor to be your best self.

It is a battle--being your authentic self-- because there are ample opportunities to throw in the towel by ignoring the whispers of your soul, following the status quo herd and pretending to be something you really aren't.  We must press on in order to find our stride and after while, who we are becomes seamless and synonymous inside and out.  Please note: this is not a one time event but an ongoing process, pursuit and lifestyle.  When we stick with the journey, we become open vessels who can give and receive, authentic individuals who just live fully and freely refusing to do life in carefully crafted compartments.  We enjoy life and just live it.  Purposefully.  Intentionally.  In wide open spaces.  Aware of our thoughts, mindful of our word choice, gracious and compassionate in loving ourselves and others.  We own our beauty (or handsomeness!) and we admire and appreciate it.  We see it for what it's truly worth.  Then we are no longer threatened or intimidated by false advertisements, the manipulative media or even the beauty of others because we know there is more than enough.  That this ample universe is burgeoning to overflowing with resources and room for everyone.  Everyone who chooses to partake, that is.  And because we know that who we are is no accidental thought or passing fluke, we humbly accept the lessons that life has to offer and through acceptance, we grow in wisdom, patience and grace.  Nobody said it would be easy.  So sometimes it does hurt, but after while, the climb starts to feel so good that we can't stop.  We don't want to.  And even though we feel worn to a nub at times, we keep going because new adventures await.  Deeper knowledge. Divine experiences and greater things generally speaking.  We may glance back--from whence we came--occasionally, but the past never holds our gaze for long because we are too grateful.  Too excited about right now, today and the future.  Things are too good to stall, so as we keep moving forward, we know that our character (the way we act when we think no one is looking), how we treat ourselves and how we treat others matters.  It really matters.  And so we decide to press on regardless of what other folks are doing.  Never forgetting this fact: what other people think of me is none of my business.  

Here's to being your best self, 


XO- Sharita

touche

The first thing that comes to mind for me is how often we look at each other and make judgments based on surface appearance and/or our opinions and ideals without getting to know the person behind the burqa or the bikini.   It is so unfortunate that in the short term, making assumptions about each other seems so much easier.  Today, I remind you and I remind myself to stop using stereotypes.  Making harsh and often untrue judgments against each other is a one way express ticket to Hell.  Call me old fashioned, but what if we took the time to listen, to care, to show love, mercy and grace or at the very least ask questions and then really hear the answers.  Imagine a world where we chose to think the best of each other, not the worst.  

Sadly, this cartoon reflects our attitudes today.  Attitudes that continue to make the world sick, corrupt minds, polarize humanity and validate our decisions to turn against each other.  It is so sad because whether we see it or not--just like this cartoon above-- we're in bondage.  To our ideals, our self-righteous existence, our flawed sense of justice and our perceived right to live our life... all the while judging others for living theirs.  Heaven, help us all is the cry of my heart.  Help us.  Help me.  To live what I believe.  To love my neighbor as myself.  To treat others with love and shower them with grace, especially when I believe they are in the wrong.  To trust God and walk in a judgment-free zone.  Oh to realize that I am not always right.  That I cannot see the entire story from beginning to end.  To know that try as I might, I am not a Savior (Jesus is) and that ultimately I do not have the power to set all things right.  This doesn't mean that I just give up, either.  No, I keep fighting, but I know that what Gandhi said is true... "An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind."  The thought of this goes against everything in me when I am wronged, hurt or just plain ol' pissed off.  You see, if my eye is the one that just got poked, this feels unpopular and uncomfortable, but it is true nonetheless. So I continue to fight with an arsenal of non-traditional weapons: vulnerability, authenticity, grace, prayer and love.  Keep fighting.  Especially when it would be easier to just give up, cuss everybody out and go have a turkey sandwich.  I don't really like turkey, but you catch my drift.  

To remember the words of Jesus whenever I am tempted to judge someone,  "Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone..."  Nice way to say shut the hell up and go sit down somewhere, huh?  Jesus is so loving and classy like that.  I want to be like him.  I do.  Yet I am too quick to pick up a stone or poke the eye of whoever just poked me, which is why I ask him to help me everyday.  Left to my own devices, I am a rank mess that overflows onto others.  We all are.  'Tis true.  But when I tune my heart to listen to his voice and meditate on his words in scripture, I go from a rank mess to a work-in-progress-masterpiece.  That's an upgrade that I'll take any day.    

When I'm tracking with Jesus, I'm not giving anybody else the side eye, philosophically venting about someone through my status update on Facebook or Tweeting with the power and speed of an F5 tornado.  Instead I feel settled, at peace and able to walk in Love because this is what I hear in my heart and spirit: we are all the same kind of different; we are His... I also realize that I am often doing the very thing that I am judging in someone else, which is why forgiveness wins, a little Grace can go a long way and Love is the best motivator.  You know, the kind, patient, non-envying, non-boasting, non-judgmental type of Love.  Not the counterfeit, narcissistic and currently prevalent idea of love that says: do it my way, it's all about me and gimme mine.  I'm talking about true Love.  The Love that we all desire deep down... Love that keeps no record of wrongs, does not dishonor others and always protects.  If you want, you can read more about that kind of Love here.  I truly desire that kind of Love in my life.  I want to give and receive Love.  

Receiving Love... God's unconditional love is step one.  Accepting that God loves you.  Unconditionally.  Yes, you.  God loves you no matter who you are, what you've done or what you're currently doing.    He loves you even if you don't love Him and contrary to popular belief, He loves everyone.  Everyone, which includes but is not limited to: Gays, Straights, Lesbians, Transgenders and Bisexuals... Liberals, Conservatives, Bigots and Activists...Folks who are Single, Married, Widowed, Divorced, Re-Married and Blended Families (hello, Jesus was in the first blended family)... He loves Criminals, Liars, Thieves and Drug Dealers alike... He loves Welfare Recipients, Coupon Queens, the Rich, the Poor, Orphans, Haters and everyone in between.  He loves President Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Bill Clinton too.  He loves people who wear a bikini and He loves people who wear a burqa too.  He loves everybody and He don't play favorites like we do*.  Accepting that fact is the hardest part, I think.  I still don't fully understand why He loves me, but I do accept it and I will tell you this: His Love is so wide and deep that you just can't wrap your mind around it.  Don't even try because it'll give you a fierce headache.  Trust me.  This is a love that defies reason.  His Love is a truth that you have to accept and believe with your heart.  You know that true Love is the majorly lacking component in this world of ours.  I believe this is precisely the reason why true Love is the gift that Jesus brings to each of us.  His Love is beautifully pure and simple because it's for you and it's free.  All you have to do?  Believe and embrace.  You see, the crux of it is this: we have to receive it before we can give it.  Try as we might, our best attempt at love is counterfeit until we get a taste of the real thing.  You can read more about this sweet Love here.  Accepting this free gift of Unconditional Love is step one.  The hardest part, I think.  So hard but so worth it because His Love is what makes me see that Ms. Bikini and Ms. Burqa are my sisters.  This Love is what motivates me to embrace the truth that we are more alike than different and it continually reminds me that we are somehow the same kind of different.  That our journeys parallel, but we can only know this about each other if we open our hearts, authentically share and truly listen without preconceived thoughts, notions and opinions.  Love prompts me to be part of the solution and gently reminds me that I am the pot so I need to stop calling the kettle black.    

Endnote: This was a weighty post for me.  I've been pondering it for months now and still the words did not go how or where I thought they would...  Yet, I followed the trail to the end and clicked "publish".  While I was mulling everything over in my heart, mind and soul, I asked a few folks to share their thoughts:  

"...the naked tail chick thinks she's free since she can dress how she wants, but showing her ass to everyone isn't really freedom.  It plays into nasty fantasies, but she's bought the lie. ..Meanwhile, Ms. Cover-Up... shows how free and holy she is, but that still plays into a very controlled and male-dominated society...  Two extremes that are both wrong." -Cheray

" One is using her body to get attention and validate her self worth.  She's not even using her mind and ironically, she covers her eyes, which are the window to her soul.  She will show skin but hide her true self.  The other exposes who she really is (through her eyes), but her skin, which is private, is covered."  -Holly

"Touche."  -my Hubster

What are your thoughts? 

*I'm bound to get flack for this statement, but I don't care because I didn't make the rule up.  God did.  (Those who don't like it can take it up with Him.) It's 100% true and the Bible proves it time and time again.  His Love is like the sun, it shines down on everyone, so don't let anyone tell you any different.  If you receive His Love, it'll change your life for the better and in more ways than you could ever imagine.   I'm living proof of that.  Pinky Promise.  

If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies...

Reveling in the joy of the Christmas season.  Love, peace and joy.  Surrounded by friends and family.  Nothing beats spending quality time with the ones you love.  Nothing.  As I look around our den... toys are everywhere, the Cosby Show just finished playing and the people I get to do life with literally bring me joy.  The holidays are a season of togetherness and rest.  A time to take into account what really matters and carry that awareness into the future.  Life is good and I am grateful.  Truly grateful.  


Here is another oldie but goodie post.  You might want to read this post first though... and be sure to check out a few of my favorite bloggers below.  




Now that you have a firm grasp on who you are at home and you've decided whether or not you like what you see, it's time to address your outlook towards change.  Whether or not you  need to make changes in your life right now, it is time to fully embrace the concept of change.  

Seasons change...

Relationships change...

You change...

I change... 

Claudia True's Art      

Change is an inevitable and constant catalyst throughout life.  So the question today is do you willingly embrace or willfully resist change?  Friends, I am learning to willingly embrace  it.  Once upon a time I viewed change as a bad thing; however, I now see that change is a positive, healthy and undeniably dynamic sign of growth.  I am reminded of this truth every time I see a butterfly.  

In the midst of change there are definitely uncomfortable moments and sometimes the process literally hurts; HOWEVER,  on the other side of change, the full beauty of the journey is on display as you are enveloped and forever transformed by the rich experience.  


My encouragement to you today is this: Do not underestimate an opportunity to experience positive change and transformation.  Change is synonymous with freedom. Just when the caterpillar thought it was all over, he became a butterfly.








These are a few of my favorite blogs...


1.  5things.us 
My good friend, Holly's blog about raising girls in today's world.  Topics include healthy relationships, identity, mean girls, media, boys and real stories of moms and teens.  Every blog is a good read.  Her most recent blog about their stocking tradition is my fav.  

2.  Music Nerd Musings
Another good friend's blog.  She talks music, music, music and her posts make me laugh, smile or reminisce every time.  Her current series is entitled December Soul, which makes the musician in me swoon. 



Christmas love and holiday hugs from me to you!!! XOXO
  

Foolywank Friday: Forgetting that seasons change...

CLICK HERE to "Like" Jadyn Noelle Photography on Facebook

 Is this Fall weather not delightful?!?!  I find myself daydreaming about lighting the fireplace, drinking hot chocolate and noshing on homemade caramel corn.  It's really hard to fathom that a few weeks ago, I was sweltering in the throes of a blistering and unrelenting heatwave.  Today the temp is a cool and breezy 57 degrees and I am lovin it!  A good friend on FB pointed out how our temps today are half, yes HALF of what they were when we were living in the days of the outdoor incinerator.   As I pondered the dramatic drop in temperature, I realized the foolywank-ness of forgetting that seasons change.  This foolywank is especially present when in the midst of an adjustment period or a tough time AKA the inferno.  This too shall pass and when we adjust to the "new normal" it will then be time to evolve again.  Such is the journey of life.  I wonder when we will accept it.  Today is as good a day as any, don't ya think?           


People change.


I change.


You change.


Hopefully for the better.




Seasons change...


Embrace Embrace Embrace.

Throwback Thursday: Remember when you were going to change the world?

Today I had the awesome pleasure of having lunch with a longtime friend who is truly a kindred spirit.  Although we hadn't seen each other face to face in several years, we share a deep connection that was forged and developed during a very special season in life.  This type of connection can never fade for it transcends all we know and converges at the very depths of who we are as individuals.  I was SO happy to see her again.  I was excited and I was expecting a time of truthful, inspiring and dynamic interaction...  cause that's how we roll.  She still looks EXACTLY the way I remember her...  lovely and radiant on the outside and within.  What I adore most about this meeting is our time of encouragement and fellowship.  We discover that our journeys are parallel in a variety of ways and really, this is no surprise.  We have been through the fire... gone to hell and back and here we are... still standing with a steady and deep resolve to live a life overflowing with joy, hope and authentic purpose. Deep calls unto deep as memories, declarations and reminders of sacred callings, hopes and dreams flood the surface.  Time feels suspended as I remember when... 
May you too be reminded of the hopes, callings and dreams of long ago for today is the due date of yesteryear.  

What's "Above the Fray" Anyway?

credit

Above the Fray is a lifestyle, an attitude, a state of mind.  It is the decision to live life on a higher plain where I am learning how to honor the truths within my heart and live every day with intention and joy. To live Above the Fray is not a one time decision.  It is a lifelong commitment...  a journey of sorts where the state of my heart, thoughts and feelings (the aspects of me that no one can see) are growing and evolving in dynamic ways.  While the individual lessons are always different, the core element of the lessons remains the same: rise above it all and soar towards the horizon of your destiny.  For me, right now, it's all about moving forward despite failures and setbacks, loving others, letting go when necessary, holding onto hope, having a grateful heart and counting my blessings, not judging (myself or others), trusting the process and living one moment at a time.  In a nutshell, it's about celebrating life each day because every lesson, failure, opportunity or setback is just another stroke of the brush that is crafting this life into a beautiful and brilliant masterpiece.  Am I a finished work of art today?  No, not yet, but one day...