you are not alone

Sometimes I pretend like I am all alone in this world.  A stereotypically and instantly oprhaned Disney character left to make it through life on my own far away from home.  I do not know why I do this.  Maybe it is my creative-dramatic personality or just an independent-loner mentality.  Maybe it's a little bit of both.  Regardless, the lonely card is absolutely bogus, ridiculous untruth.  

So today I think what if I stop telling myself that I am all alone in this world?

What if I start remembering all the instances of laughter, love and undeniable this-person-is-in-my-corner-ness that is there? Oh yes, it is there... if only we will acknowledge it.  

For me lately, support has revealed itself in the following ways: 

unwavering love, support and loyalty that is my hubster

connecting with a bestie (friends since high school) umpteen years later and through it all, the love grows deeper still

full-bodied conversation with a forever friend I met way back in college

belly laughs regarding foolywank performances, Wolverine, ice sculptures and the engraving of a machete

kindred spirits traveling cross country and back with a kitty cat to boot #goodtimes 

friends forev

swimming and soaking up the sun on the 4th of July

keeping it real about struggles, transitions and life lessons

an encouraging comment or email that comes along right when I'm wondering if this blog thing even matters (You know who you are and I truly appreciate your heartfelt expressions. For reals, I do.)

witnessing a dream come true for my little one via Mam, Pap, Aunt Sissy and Kasey the Power Ranger 

connecting over coffee and goodies that were microwaved too long... legs with milk spots #LOL

safety, protection, provision, guardian angels, a cousin-sister, snuggles, chasing lightning bugs, dancing and doing the daily work of being my best self.  

All evidence of a lavish life full of love, encouragement and unwavering support.  You have it too, you know.  Yes, there is always a handful of haters fringe minority handful of haters who don't understand, but that's OK because: 

1. I don't get them either lol! 

2.  What others think of me is none of my business, 'member?

3.  Haters gonna hate, so let 'em hate while we live a life that's great (haha I rhymed! #rapperswag ... not really lol)

When I look around and see how many people I love, how many people love me and are in my corner, it makes my heart smile and then swell with love and gratitude.  Today I hope that you will open your eyes to the caring connections, lavish love and steady support that you have in your life because it is there.  Undeniably.  

foolywank friday: everything is easy #lie

Pretending like life is easy.  Why do we do it?  Why do we lie to ourselves and others saying everything is all good when it isn't? Sometimes life delivers a tough and swift kick to the gut; other times life delivers a huge bouquet right on our doorstep.  My point today is this:  when life is tough... and at some point it will be because the struggle is inevitable... reach out to someone you can trust and let them know what's up.  We all need encouragement and support on the regular, but during the tough times, we need it even more.  

Stop pretending like _______ isn't hard.  


Fill in the blank...


life
this relationship
working
trusting others
marriage
trying again
moving
moving on
cleaning up
saying goodbye
child-rearing
letting go
divorce
single parenting
holidays with/without the extended fam
working out
kicking a habit
eating healthy 
transition
empty nest
love
sickness
death
being your best self

Fill in the blank and then stop pretending.  Because in this case, pretending is synonymous with lying to yourself and we all know that lying to yourself is NEVER a good thing. 

Life is hard sometimes because it is a battle.  

Oh yes, there are moments of reprieve: time to reflect and take in all the beauty and splendor. Yet there are undeniable times of disappointment or momentary paralysis.  In those difficult moments, it is important to say (admit!) to a loved one or trusted friend that this situation "is hard" or things are "rough right now."  Sometimes we just need to say it so we can hear that loved one or trusted friend say, "I can imagine" or "I understand" ... or perhaps they'll sit with us, hug us, pray for us, talk us off the ledge or simply hold our hand.  

Sometimes we need to hear "I know it's tough, BUT YOU CAN DO IT."

Sometimes it's hard and then it gets hardER before it gets easy.  

Just keep pressing on, my friend.  Change is coming.  The struggle is inevitable, but change is too.  So is triumph and it is in your blood to battle and emerge victoriously.  

Quit pretending like it's not hard sometimes though.  Everything is easy = Lie.

Life is gloriously brutal, breathtakingly beautiful, worth doing.

Fight hard for faith, family, friendship, hopes, dreams and love.

These things are all worthwhile.

Let's just make sure we love, support and encourage each other along the way.  

We will come through it if we are willing to press on rather than pretend.  

Hey Yall!!!

Welcome to my corner of the web!  I am so excited to be posting my FIRST blog!  I wanted to start a blog years ago, but I kept making excuses.  Finally, I'm over it!  I've put it off long enough... so today is the day!!!!!  Here at Above the Fray, I hope to provide encouragement and inspiration for folks to live out their dreams, discuss life challenges and find solutions, fully embrace the adventure of life, share the laughter & love, navigate the ups and downs, and never ever ever give up!
By nature, I am an encourager and a dreamer ... eternally optimistic and genuinely enthusiastic (unless I'm sleepy or hungry and then... not so much).  I appreciate good music, hot tea, connecting with others, true friends, supportive family, just about anything vintage, hugs and laughter that makes my side hurt.  I am a deeply creative, highly sensitive person who is often thinking outside of the typical parameters.  Without a doubt, I believe that everyone has the gifting and ability to contribute something that is special and unique to the world.  Everyday everyone gets another chance to live their best life.  If life sucks today, be encouraged...things will get better!  If your life is already good, well things can just keep getting better.  YOU, your attitude and your circle of influence are major determining factors.  
Let's support and motivate each another along the road of authentic living!  
I'm gonna make a difference in this world and I know that you can too!  I do hope you'll join me.  It'll be a fun ride!!! There's a little piece of the dream in my heart...  Writing this blog to you today is a part of my dream.  What's your dream?